On dreams…

“Dreams are the touchstones of our character” -Henry David Thoreau

I leave for Basic Combat Training in 21 days, exactly three weeks.  One thing that I have pondered recently is what I am potentially giving up by taking this career path.  Since I was young my want to explore, create, and imagine dominated my being.  My youth was not so different from Calvin, the young protagonist of the Calvin and Hobbes series by Bill Watterson.

I dreamed about being just about anything, from the realistic (doctor, artist, marine biologist, fighter pilot) to the fantastic (Jedi, dinosaur hunter, Ghostbuster).  One dream that formed and finally solidified was my dream to make a movie – write, shoot, direct, edit, or all four for a major, feature-length film.  I didn’t really care about the money or fame.  In essence, I wanted to make my imagination come to life.  I wanted to imagine something, put it on paper, then put it on screen.  That’s why I got a degree in Electronic Media Production from Harding University.  The idea was that would put me on my way to realizing that dream.  Through different circumstances, some good and some bad, I realized that dream started to fade.  It made me sad, especially to see one of my friends doing so well with his dream.  We roomed together, made short videos together, had class together, and dreamed together.  Now I’m leaving soon for the Army to start a career very different from any I initially imagined.  Did I give up my dream?

Yes.  And no.  I kept thinking about giving up a dream as a failure, but that really isn’t the case.  Some dreams have merely been exchanged for other dreams.  Rachel once had a dream of becoming a famous opera singer, but she exchanged that dream for a beautiful daughter and motherhood.  Was that dream lost?  You would have to ask Rachel, but my guess is that she wouldn’t exchange Abby for anything in this world (unless it is dinner time and Abby keeps spitting out her food).  I’m very excited for this new dream I have: work hard through basic training and officer training to become an officer of the United States Army, so I can provide for my family and server others.  I want to travel, see the world, and have my family along for the adventure.  This is a dream I feel is worth the exchange.

Casey out.

PS – Dave has to keep at it because I know that he is going to be famous one day for editing, directing, screenwriting, or all of the above.  I need him to succeed so I can also live vicariously through him.

Why God gives you children

Prometheus Bound (Jordaens, 1640, Cologne)

This week has been a little taxing with yesterday being the worst.  Two big things happened which were part of my own inattention.  On Wednesday morning when I was switching out laundry I discovered my cell phone sitting in the bottom of the washer.  I’ve had that phone for well over a year and, up until that point, was still in like-new condition with only a couple superficial scratches on the casing.  What makes the situation worse is that I’ve had an upgrade due for a long time but was waiting.  I leave for basic November 18.  The phone only really needed to last until then.  After all my training I was planning on saving up and getting a nice iPhone 3GS (or whatever the equivalent would be had Apple released a new one).  As a temporary measure I’m using Dan Ockay’s old Motorola SLVR.  I really appreciate it, but it is older, some buttons are missing, and I can’t be heard by the receiving end if I hold the phone in certain ways.

Yesterday morning Rachel and I both got up late.  Abby had either slept in or was very silent after she woke up so we didn’t get up until almost 9am.  In one way that was great.  Sleeping in once in awhile is nice.  On the other hand it threw me off and laundry needed to get done before I left for work so I had a shirt and pants to wear.  I threw all my stuff in the washer and then had breakfast with Rachel and Abby.  When the washer was done I went to put stuff in the dryer.  Guess what I found?  Wrong!  It wasn’t Dan’s phone – it was my iPod touch!  It took several moments for my brain to completely decipher what my eyes were seeing.  There, in the bottom of the washer, was my iPod touch.  It was just lying there…dead.  There was no reviving it.  I yelled to the tune of 5000 screaming children.  The anger I felt was that of the old gods, like Zues’ anger at Prometheus for giving fire to the mortals.  Fire shot from my eyes and lightening from my fingertips.  In a very unChristian-like manner I gave in to my anger and frustration and let it burn.  Rachel didn’t bother to say much of anything to me because she knew I was in a “mood”.  I didn’t care.

I was so angry I considered skipping work.  Now that wouldn’t have been very responsible so I started getting ready for work.  I went into the half bath (slamming the bedroom door in the process) and started shaving.  This did not have any sort of calming effect by the way.  It’s not a good idea to shave angry.  While I was shaving I heard the bedroom door open and soon after I felt something grab my left hand, which was hanging to my side.  I looked down and saw little Abby standing there, holding my hand and smiling at me.  It was like she knew I was really upset and did the only thing she understood.  My heart broke and my anger faded into nothing.

Sometimes I get mad and lose my patience with Abby.  I shouldn’t, but I do.  She doesn’t understand.  I should always remember that she is a blessing and part of God’s plan for me, even if I don’t always know the how or why.

We are 200% awesome.

Casey out.

Army Strong

I, Casey Edward Cochran, do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice. So help me God.

These were the words I spoke at the MEPS (Military Entrance Processing Station) in Little Rock on Friday, July 31, 2009 at approximately 1045.  Words cannot express the excitement I felt as I spoke them.  I am now a member of the United States Army.  I am a future soldier.  I leave for Basic Combat Training at Fort Sill, Oklahoma on November 18 and there are only two other events of my life that I have been more important to me than this.  I will be gone for six months of training, 3 of Basic and 3 of OCS (Officer Candidate School).  It will be hard, but it will be the best thing I know that I could do for myself and my family.

Casey out.

Transformers 2

I’ll try and write more later, maybe a review, but I read this and it made sense to me, so I thought I’d repost it here:

Transformers 2 was a spectacle, a visual delight, and I was entertained. That’s more than enough for me.
For those who were expecting or demanding a Shakespearean effort, let me remind you what the subject matter is: Alien robots that turn into cars.
And sometimes planes. Ryan Sohmer (full post here)

Casey out.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crappy Movie

I just watched Indy 4 last night.  I have a review up on the site here.

Casey out.

Computer fix ‘em up

I’ve been having a terrible time with my computer.  Several months ago when I went to boot up in Mac OS X, it wouldn’t work.  I was rather confused so I tried this and that but to no avail.  You can imagine my state of mind having something broken on my beautiful iMac.  The good news for the time being was that my Windows side was still working fine…mostly.  One big problem I had was that whenever my computer was shut down or turned off unexpectedly I could not boot up into anything for a period of time.  The time it took to “cool down” increased from around 15 minutes when this first started to 8 or more hours the last time it happened.

Of course we could not afford to take it to a computer shop and have them charge us hundreds of dollars to fix it, so I was a little down at the fact that my computer might remain busted for some time.  That is until I read I could do it myself.  I knew this was a classic case of hard drive failure, which was very odd because the Windows side seemed to work well.  It had trouble now and then, but I could run it for hours and hours with nary a problem.  After telling Rachel I could do it myself, I promptly went to Newegg and ordered a new hard drive.

*As a caveat, I do all my computer component shopping at Newegg.  They have great service and prices.*

My hard drive arrived yesterday and the surgery began.

Properly sedated.

Cheap suction cups from Wal-Mart.

Applying suction.

Taking off the glass. Yeah, I broke a couple peg thingys.

My guts!

The charming Nate McCoy holding up the LCD so I can replace the HD.

Welcome back OS X!

It was both wild AND scary.  I actually didn’t have the necessary TORX screwdrivers, but Nate happened to have them in his car so he stopped by after work and assisted.  For the most part, everything went very smoothly with the exception of me breaking off a couple pegs that keep the glass aligned on the monitor.  I still had 6 or 8 left to keep it in place and it stays on via magnets so it is fine.  Overall it was a resounding success.

After the hardware repair OS X installed flawlessly and I was able to also install the Windows 7 release client under Boot Camp.  Everything is running now as smooth as butter on a bald monkey.  Woot!

Casey out.

New new new!

Site update:

1. New theme.
2. I joined Twitter and the tweets are listed to the right.
3. I’m going to try and start reviewing movies and games.  I think it would be fun.

Casey out…for now.

…and the horse dragged me

If you notice, I am 10 levels higher than my first previous post.  I guess you could say I’ve been pulled back in.  This time, however, I have been much more responsible with my play time; even Rachel would agree.  On to other things.

A couple weeks ago, my seizures became suddenly worse.  This was odd because I had been sleeping well, there had been no new life changes, no additional stress.  Rachel and I couldn’t figure out what was going on.  It was so bad that I had to miss a week of work.  Luckily I had just enough sick/vacation time to cover the time lost.  I was able to go to the neurologist last Thursday and he wants me to do another study, which means a nice stay in the hospital.  That’s going to be fun again.

This week has been a little better, plus I’ve been playing the bachelor because Rachel and Abby have been in Northern Kentucky/Ohio for almost the last week.  It was nice, but I’ll be glad to have them back home.  I miss them.  They are due back soon.

Casey out.

fell off the horse

I just couldn’t resist.  Though it’s not permanent, I decided to try the World of Warcraft: Wrath of the Lich King free 10-day trial.  Rachel was sad.  Once in the game again, it was like a whole new world; so many changes had occured since I was last on around 9 months ago.  The game brought back a whole new sense of excitement.  Something unexpected also occurred.  People in my guild that I knew before were genuinely excited to “see” me again.  One guild member was out of town and his girlfriend saw me on, called him, and told him that I was playing.  She relayed a “hello” and “hope to see you online soon.”

And maybe that’s it.  I’m not much of a social person, ask anyone, but I really enjoy the camaraderie that has developed in the guild Travis Bearden and I founded almost two years ago.  It now boasts over 100 members, many of them active players.  They are participating in advanced activities I never thought we would accomplish.  I found that I loved being someone who could help out.  I was the guy who knew things.  In my prime, I could answer just about any question and if I didn’t know, could find it in 2 minutes or less.  I helped people with quests and dungeons.  The only thing I asked in return was they do the same for their guildmates.  I think that’s what I miss.  The social connection.  After all the talk of addictive gameplay, the cyclical nature of the game, it never ends, all I really wanted is to help others and hang out with them in a world where we have something very much in common.

Naberius out.

a brand new year

Christmas has come and gone, the year is now 2009, and I’m due for a post.